The Bad Beginning (A series of unfortunate Events #1) – Minus two bizarre stars

Because these characters are SO NOT NORMAL!

Huh? Bizarroland much?

Minus 2 stars!

About the book

The Bad Beginning (A series of unfortunate Events #1)

[Library book]

Dear Reader,

I’m sorry to say that the book you are holding in your hands is extremely unpleasant. It tells an unhappy tale about three very unlucky children. Even though they are charming and clever, the Baudelaire siblings lead lives filled with misery and woe. From the very first page of this book when the children are at the beach and receive terrible news, continuing on through the entire story, disaster lurks at their heels. One might say they are magnets for misfortune.

In this short book alone, the three youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing, a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, and cold porridge for breakfast.

It is my sad duty to write down these unpleasant tales, but there is nothing stopping you from putting this book down at once and reading something happy, if you prefer that sort of thing.

With all due respect,

Lemony Snicket

Review

This book actually OWES me at least two stars!

I think this is the first negative [as in actually minus two sta] review I have ever written.

Is it me people?????? Or is the books???

Am I hallucinating or some middle grade books are just plain morbid?????

What is it with all this child abuse, bullying, loss and suffering and grief???

So…. I’m reading about these cute kids, they are having this awesome day at the beach and then out of nowhere… BAM! Tragedy strikes. And I’m like OUCH but… Well ok… Let’s get over it because, that’s life right?

But then….

Welcooooooome to bizarroland!

These kids go to ground zero, you know where this huge tragedy happened, and are they like sad? Maybe because they lost loved ones???? Nope… They are sad because… Wait… Let me recheck just in case…

Yup. They are sad because “his favorite pen had turned to ash”.

But you know… This book is super famous, everyone loves, there is a movie… So I’m like… let’s do like my beloved Dory

Let’s Keep Reading!

Soooooo, then these bizarre kids go to live with an even more bizarre guy that is just plain cold and cruel his soul drier than my kids cereal raisins. And then this cold soulless raisin kicks them out a few days later and they go live with a relative who…. Ready??? A relative who opens the door to greet them and says…

“Yes, I heard about the accident. I’m Justice Strauss”

No “Sorry for your loss kids” or not even a cold but polite “my condolences” Nope. Just…

“Yes, I heard about the accident. I’m Justice Strauss”

I know the blurb gave me a warning

I’m sorry to say that the book you are holding in your hands is extremely unpleasant. It tells an unhappy tale about three very unlucky children.

BUT this is just plain WEIRD! Weirdo kids, weirdo friend, weirdo relative, no one here behaves normally! The dialogues are so void of emotion that just plainly stilted. So I’m like…

Is this maybe a sci-fi book and this people are cyborgs???

Or…

Is this a horror book and these people are demons?

A physiological thriller and they are psychos?

So, I go and check again. Nope. It’s supposed to be a “regular” middle grade book.

Hummmm… So I’m like… Is it just bad writing??? The writer doesn’t know how to portray normal people with normal reactions???

So NOPE. NUH UH.  NO WAY JOSE. I DID NOT LIKE IT. AND I don’t recommend this book to anyone. AND I will not get this book for my Spawns, HUMPH!

You can see all my reactions here in the Goodreads summary…

What about you? have you read this series? Did you like it? What about the movie?

Thank you for visiting!

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